May 3, 2006

 

Friday, May 5th is the second “Cafe of the Dead” I’m leading.  I started the first one by “taking our pulse” at the start of our journey together.  There was much intense discussion regarding what our current understanding of dying to ourselves really meant.  I was looking for a baseline, setting a marker at the start of the journey that we could compare to and look back upon to see if new discovery, understandings or insights would produce any sort of shift over time.

I’m still open to the experiment of you fellow voxies (as in “homies”… or the recently popular “churchies”… yes the kids are saying that) submitting a short vid of yourselves giving a blurb about your take on the subject.  See here for more details/format.  There’s one more Cafe of the Dead in a month if this Friday seems a bit quick to pull your thoughts together.

Or you can throw your 2 cents in here on some of the questions we’ll be chewing on….

(references: 2 Corinthians 4:10, Mark 8:34, Romans 6:2-8, Galatians 2:19-20, Philippians 1:20-22, Colossians 2:20)

Why do we have to die?  Why does Jesus require us to die to ourselves?  What is it about following Him that we can only do or experience while dead?  Especially when I see me (and, to be blunt, all those around me) getting by just fine and living a spiritual Christian life without taking it to that level.  Sacrificing some… maybe even most… just not all.  What does “all” look like?  (No “it’s different for everyone” answers allowed.  If you need it to be subjective to wrap your head around it then: what does it look like to you or for you?  Despite individual differences there must be marks of this death that are common to all)  Have we ever even seen anybody actually living this out? (or “dying this out” I guess).

In the accent of that “vaklempt” Mike Myers character from old SNL:  Discuss.

The first iteration of The Mix came and went this past Friday. Thanks to those who prayed.

First: the good stuff…

The event went really, really well. Things came together well and in some instances pretty much miraculously. We had the most Riverwood young adults out that we’ve ever had at a single event. Kristie and Roshonna did an awesome job with the live music.

Second: the tough stuff…

Only three people from the community came. I know, I know… my attitude should be AWESOME! 3 PEOPLE CAME! I’ll get there. Everyone else around me had that attitude. They had taken to heart  (better than I had) my pre-event encouragement that this is the first time we’re doing this… whatever happens we will build on for the next one… we’ll learn some great things from this.  And it’s all true and I’ll get there.  But if you’ve ever put yourself out there and poured yourself out and given much to painstakingly create something… with all the hopes, dreams and visions that entails…. and have so few show up… you understand my dissappointment.

Plus I couldn’t get my camera to take decent pics.

Third:  good stuff, part 2…

It was SO good to get this first one under our belt.  And yes, we learned tonnes that will benefit us for the next one.  And even though few showed it was great to see that we could actually do this and be prepared for so many more.

It also has challenged my ministry in a positive way in terms of re-thinking how best to connect and impact the young adults in the surrounding community.  I can’t sit in my office and send out flyers and expect them to just come to me.  I’ve got to get out there.  Not sure what that will look like yet.

I’m not the first in ministry to experience this sort of a lack of response to something worked so hard on… and I won’t be the last.  This is normal.  If you have two failures for every success, you’re actually ahead of the curve.  If somebody reading this now has a similar experience in the future… it would be a great joy to me if they remembered this post and were strengthened in their dissappointment.

And I get to experience dissappointment and, in my eyes, failure.  Yes I consider this a positive.  Very much so.  All of life is a classroom if you let it be.  And I get to experience God in this.  Teaching me and changing me.  Maybe you think failure is a bit harsh.  I know there were many successes in that evening.  Let me give you a glimpse of my heart:  I feel failure over every young adult from Riverwood that hasn’t connected to Stir yet.  I feel failure over every young adult from the neighbourhood that didn’t come to The Mix on Friday.  Resist the urge to set me straight, however gently and lovingly.  I eagerly embrace the breaking of my heart over those God has called me to love.  It is what it is and God and I are having an amazing discussion about it.

After all I am nooc.  Yet He is using me.  Thus I am alive.